Monday, October 19, 2009

Like, The Hugest News Ever, Probably.

UMMMM... you guys are missing the party. Now it's over here on We did this for you lazy readers who were tired of taking the time to add that extra "blogspot" to the URL. YOU'RE WELCOME! Now to go the new site, send us some new annoying status updates, and let's have fun and make it greater than ever. Feedback is greatly appreciated!



Part of the reason I loved this submission was that our submitter, C (THANKS!) titled the e-mail “Holy Shit” and prefaced it by saying, “I need brain bleach. Check out this make-you-throw-up-in-your-mouth post.” There’s nothing like starting your week with a “Holy-Shit-Brain-Bleach-Throw-Up-In-Your-Mouth” e-mail. I was excited to spread the love.

C also attached a photo of Iris, which makes this whole thing even more barf-worthy:

New rule: if you’re going to make pussy/vag references in your status updates, you must be at least a total babe and practically naked. No Golden Girls need apply.

Friday, October 16, 2009


I sort of hope that the "stupid little girl" in question is not Elinor's daughter. I mean, how "little" are we talking? And is that in reference to her size or her age? Mind you, I don't think it's very nice to slander little people OR children.

I think we can ALL agree that Elinor should somehow smelt her anger (?).

Thanks for the submission!

Thursday, October 15, 2009


Did Ankur become a doctor just so he could brag to his friends about cardiology? I hope he doesn't get laid for this. There is so much wrong with this status I don't really know what to say. So I'm relaying a message from our submitter, K (thanks! xoxo):

So ankur....ugh. does he have to update his status about every milestone in life? what's next? currently screwing my trophy wife...badass? grosssssssssssssssss.


Wednesday, October 14, 2009


We know that Emily is obsessed with the gym, but she's really jumped the shark. I'm not your momma but girl, keep that white upper thigh to yourself.

Maybe I'm just upset because I'm not making as much progress as Emily. I've totally plateaued. But then again, I look like this.


I thought it was bad when Lauren got six comments about her dead pet, but 26? Really? Will we never learn NOT to update our status' about dead animals?

And just to annoy Samantha... click here!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009


I woke up to this in my In-Box, with the following note attached:

Oh Exalted One:

You may be blazing the trail to Facebook salvation, but you just took 2 steps backward. I bet you still have a Myspace page.

Love and Kisses,

Now, I've always known that I love Annoying Status Call Outs, but the question is: do I love it when someone calls me out on my own blog? The answer is yes, yes I do. Thanks for being such a smart-ass bitch, "Samantha."


I think you're confusing the words "dying" and "annoying."

Monday, October 12, 2009


Please consult this young lady for all your geography/lesbian questions. She seems to have graduated from some sort of genius academy. Before this update was submitted to us, (thanks, A!), I didn't know Lesbos was a country in Greece, either!!!! But I'm sure she's right.)

Friday, October 9, 2009


Get ready y'all, it's time for a FACEBOOK MONTAGE! That's right, whenever something so kick-ass or heinous happens and rocks your news feed like a computer virus that just won't quit, we report on it - nay - we MONTAGE it.

Here we have a small sampling of folks with a mixed reaction to the news that President Obama has won the Nobel Peace Prize. While Kelly, clearly an avid peace-maker herself, is frustrated with the decision, Mark questions how this decision will affect Obama's adversaries. Jaymeeeeeeeee is just pissed that her girl Oprah lost (again!).

Me? I'm just happy that all these intelligent and independent thinkers have given me something to MONTAGE about.


This status update has it all. Emily kicks off the conversation with a completely inane statement, followed by way too many !!!!!s, she gets schooled by Sarah, Dad brings down the mood with some threatening remarks, Darius adds some comic relief, and Dad even jumps back in for some slightly inappropriate banter. I laughed, I cried, I popped off some stains in tha back seat. (?)

(I actually pulled this from Hope that's okay, Frisky! Thanks!)

Thursday, October 8, 2009


Submitter, A., writes "Its like we get it, your phone gets the internet. Welcome to five years ago." I couldn't have said it better myself. Maybe Joseph and Steve need to start hanging out in 2004.

Also, don't forget to become a fan on facebook. I die a little inside every time you don't... so, you don't want that on your conscience. Click here to become a fan!


Thanks for facilitating this captivating conversation, Rosie. Your grasp of Canadian culture is remarkably astute, and your sage commentary proves you are wise beyond your years. When's the book coming out?

Wednesday, October 7, 2009


Why does love always feel like a battlefield? A battlefield! A battlefield! I guess you better go get your armor (get your armor!), get your armor.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009


Somebody get this girl a diary, fast. One with a lock on it. That way, Stephanie can keep on having her mind-boggling ephiphanies and nobody has to be subjected to them. Since this was submitted to us (Thank you kindly, J!) I have no idea how many more things Stephanie learned today. Clicking on "Read More" would probably have been a huge mistake.


This is more-so embarrassing than annoying, but really it's both, so I posted it anyway. Not only is Ashley (who is in her mid-twenties) so dedicated to facebook's FarmVille that she writes a desperate status about it, but she also both "liked" and commented on her own FarmVille-centric status. Awesome.

Also note: become a fan of YSIA on facebook NOW... and tell your friends. Because I can't tell my friends. Because I make fun of all my friends here.

Monday, October 5, 2009


Really? Well if you see her can you tell her nobody cares? She seems to be under the impression that writing her own status in the third person will make it seem less stupid. But she is wrong. (We KNOW how this status update thing works, Rosie. We KNOW it's you typing. Stop acting like you have an auto-biographer documenting your every AWESOME move.)

(Thanks to the submitter, K!)

HUGE NEWS - we're on facebook!

Ok, so there is this new website I just found that I thought you all might love. Its called (formerly

I know what you're thinking... it sounds exciting, right? Well it is.

Even more exciting? We're on it! So you had better become a facebook fan of Your Status is Annoying (YSIA), or we're going to put your status' on our site. Just kidding, we'll do that either way. But seriously, become a fan. We have zero right now. So GO DO IT!


Perhaps this should have read "My bouquet of fruit AND BEAR from my hubby."

Unless, of course, the fruit is from both your hubby and from bear... in which case, I'm pretty pissed because bear got me nothing for my birthday this year.

Friday, October 2, 2009


This is amazing. This is like art imitating life imitating art imitating dumb-ass status' imitating awesome-ness. We need more of this, stat.

Thanks to Em for the submission, and to Callan for owning up to his YSIA qualifications.


I've thought about it: The only thing that would annoy me more than hearing two people in the battle of Who-Loves-Who-More is if they each were to sit on one of my knees and start making out in my lap.

Christina has already managed to soil my status update feed with her unbearable telephone conversation, so I wouldn't be surprised if she found out some way to subject me to watching her and her boyfriend in some serious PDA on my status feed, too.

Thursday, October 1, 2009


My reaction upon reading this post:

"Oh, Gawd!" Turn away in horror

I am anti-hernia, I am anti-hearing-about-anyone's-hernia and as hard as you've tried throughout your lifetime John, you have rendered yourself un-datable with this status alone.

Disclaimer: for those of you who want to Google hernia, do not do it at work. The resulting images are NSFW.


Keep this shit on Twitter.